The Divorced Mama Bear

Can people really change? If you had asked me that question a year ago, I would have said absolutely not. That's why I got a divorce- because I thought things would never change. My mindset has completely shifted on this topic recently because of the own changes I've made in my life. I saw that I, myself, could change...so if I can do it, anyone can do it. The trick is, though, you have to want to change. No one can do the changing for you. And once you want it, you have to keep wanting it, because you will constantly have to check yourself to ensure you're not going back to your old ways. It gets easier with time. As you adopt those changes and apply them daily, your new way of doing things starts overtaking the old ways. But there are still going to be times when challenges pop up and you have to stay committed to acting in a way that aligns with the positive changes you've made in your life. It's been drilled into us that people don't change. Who you are is w...

I started getting migraines when I was 15.  They were bad enough to make me hole up in my bedroom for the day, but they were manageable.  These "normal" migraines continued until I was 25....then I had my son and everything changed. I was okay after I first delivered him, but when he was a few months old, I started noticing I was having trouble driving.  I'd get dizzy on winding roads (we lived in the country at the time), and sometimes I'd have to pull over to sit for a few minutes until the spinning stopped. I mentioned it to my doctor and he said I probably had BPPV (benign paroxysmal positional vertigo), which is when small calcium crystals kind of float around in your inner ear and make you dizzy.  He gave me a prescription for meclizine and sent me on my way. I tried this for awhile, but it wasn't really helping.  Being a busy mom with a little one at home, I just dealt with it for awhile.  That was until one morning when everything changed. My son wa...

Marriage is all about being a team and putting your partner's needs before your own. For better or worse, you're making a vow to love, honor, and cherish your spouse for life. Divorce ends all that. You no longer have to put another person first (except for your children), and it leaves you with both a feeling of freedom and uncertainty. It kind of feels wrong. You've spent your entire marriage planning on being in a partnership for the rest of your life and now you're flying solo. At first, you might feel a little guilty doing things that you never would have done if you were still married. It feels foreign, and that's normal. This is your time to do what YOU want to do. You don't, quite frankly, have to answer to anyone. Not everyone is going to like the choices you make, but guess what...it's your life. You don't owe anyone anything. Until you make a commitment to someone again, you are free to do whatever you want, whenever you want. Not ...